Sitting with Sophi this morning.
"I saw the deer, and I swear he said thank you. I know, that's crazy."
"I love you... I'm sorry, that's weird."
"Could've sworn the trees were talking to me. I'm crazy."
"Sorry. sorry. sorry. sorry. sorry."
"They all turned to me and had the mark of Siva. A sign, but not a sign..."
The deer did talk to you. And it's not crazy.
I love you, too. It's real.
They were, and no you are not.
I'm not. You shouldn't be either.
Actually, I saw those horses. That is definitely the mark of Siva, and I'll take it.
Nurture has gotten us in a funny place. Because so much of our nurture is rooted in society and society is rooted in monotheistic culture, and because monotheistic culture relies on good-works-deserve-reward, and sins-shall-be-punished, we are losing sight just to maintain a "win".
Basic identification of nurture, as agreed upon through searching consensus (that's another conversation):
"care for and encourage the growth or development of."
"the process of caring for and encouraging the growth or development of someone or something.
"the nurture of ethics and integrity"
synonyms:encouragement, promotion, fostering, development, cultivation, boosting, furtherance, advancement"the nurture of ideas"
Judeo/Christian roots of agriculture and dis-trust of nature. Here's what C.S. Lewis says in The Fall of Man chapter in the Problem of Pain (Subtitle: The intellectual problem raised by human suffering, examined with sympathy and realism). And yes, of the Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe) says of lovers and God-ness (in the dual way):
WRONG PLACE FOR THIS QUOTE:
A lover, in obedience to a quite uncalculating impulse, which may be full of good will as well as of desire and need not be forgetful of God, embraces his beloved, and then quite innocently, experiences a thrill of sexual pleasures; but the second embrace may have that pleasure in view may be a means to an end, may be the first downward step towards the state of regarding a fellow creature as a thing, as a machine to be used for his pleasure. Thus the bloom of innocence, the element of obedience and the readiness to take what comes is rubbed off every activity.
This is a breeze-by. A generality, which a sibling indicated to me that dis-proves any acuity in a subject. Alas, I pay attention. LIke to the point where I can't get myself out of it.
Warbler reference for englightenment & god and agriculture and inputs.
The willingness to trust the body and the soul that creaks through it, is not allowed. We've known it all along. A woman here knew she was adopted and no one told her. Until it was so long, and she had lost her tethers to her instinct. Nurture over nature.
Another woman I know so well and for my entire life has pushed aside her dharmic path of music and writing because the parental units trained her to be a wife, to not ever dream of her own artistic career.
I, too, have been victim of this. And I find the whispers, after tremendous (like, 2/3 of my life lived so far) efforts to do away with narrative, still hearing snide responses and judgments around my gestures. It takes a daily practice and maintaining good souls around that keep me afloat, and even flying--- but it can crash at any moment. I can even see the parts of the facial expressions that lend towards the nurture, and how the nature pushes through, dreamily.
Thing is, at some point, we started to distrust ourselves. Whether we told ourselves that, through society or someone else's suggestion, or if we were told things that fostered the disconnect, may it be so that we begin to walk back towards ourselves. And with that, towards the nature. The reciprocal understanding of nature themself.