As I practiced today, I bowed to all manner of aspects in this life. Born from "The 9" as we call it in our sangha, we release or invoke through each surya namaskar, or sun salutation. Over the course of many many years, this practice continuously unfolds into new potency. Sometimes, I release, invoke, invoke and then forget, and once in a while, the reason comes to me- an ask from the *(*ve(*@. And today, it was for women "like" me.*
I pray for the woman like me. The one for whom this world has no established "place."
May we all find our irreplaceable "place."
May not one factor of convention influence this place.
May it not be even just for the childless, the unmarried- but for those women, I feel it.
May it be also for the mamas who get lost in their mamahood, finding their kaleidoscope of aspects. May we all find our kaleidoscope, calling on each color as we need them, want them, and may some of them even surprise us.
May we all find our irreplaceable place at the seat of our hearts.
*but not just like me--- like all of us who feel that we've missed some sort of boat as we hide under the table of the four tradition, false
Now, on the "why" of the bucking, like a steer, the convention, like a rattling cowboy that has our proverbial balls tied up to our bellies- where the creation and the security meet. Fuck that. Right? So, where does the convention live?
It lives here, and is referenced easily to Bacon's Four Stumbling Blocks to Truth, bestowed upon me by my birth father:
Four very significant stumbling-blocks in the way of grasping the truth, which hinder every man (sic) however learned, and scarcely allow anyone to win a clear title to wisdom, namely:
the example of weak and unworthy authority,
the feeling of the ignorant crowd, and the
hiding of our own ignorance while making a display of our apparent knowledge.
So, here's why "enoughness" is so damn radical. If you can possibly clear the path (Jai Ganesha!) in the way to this truth, you might actually have the opportunity to take a slow and refreshing pause, and release yourself into the sense of enoughness.
May lack disappear and the longing for whatever has just disappeared cease your suffering.